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| 1.Q |
Tell me
about the first time you remember being thrilled. |
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| 1.A |
I’ve
been fascinated with spanking for as long as i can remember.
As a child, it was always thoughts of me being spanked, but
as i grew, as did my obsession, more often then not, i became
the spanker of my fantasies, and many experiences, both with
my present wife, and other girls i’ve had relationships
with in the past. Though on occasion i am still on the receiving
end. |
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| 2.Q |
What’s the slightest thing
to have thrilled you? |
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| 2.A |
At 3, I
remember getting a Casper chalk board for my birthday. It was
a regular chalk-board, but it had a cartoon strip around the
boarder, and in one square, I believe it was Casper, but it
was a long time ago and it may have been a secondary character,
was administered a spanking, and i remember longingly wishing
it was me, even back at 3 years old. |
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| 3.Q |
What’s the most frightening
yet thrilling thing you’ve done? |
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| 3.A |
With every
relationship i’ve ever been in, the initial revealing
of my secret desire is always something terrifying, for fear
of how it will be seen by whomever i’m developing a new
relationship with. i’ve been pretty lucky in the past,
and couldn’t feel more lucky about finding my wife of
5 years, who’s not only super understanding about ‘this’,
but about everything. She’s my best friend. |
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| 4.Q |
Tell me
why you’re not completely sensible. |
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| 4.A |
I’m
far from what you could call sensible at all. i’ve had,
and am presently having a rough time with drug addiction, depression,
and some serious problems that my wife is dealing with, that
are very rough on the both of us. |
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| 5.Q |
What’s
the most uninhibited thing you’ve ever done? |
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| 5.A |
Before
we were married, at a family reunion on Far Rockaway, we snuck
away down to the beach, and made love under the stars, not 50
feet from a party of family members i had never met. |
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| 6.Q |
What have
you considered doing for pleasure but were too concerned about
the risks? |
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| 6.A |
I’ve
pretty much always ignored the risks of my actions, which leads
me generally into pretty hairy situations, but I feel that we’re
here on this planet at this time to accumulate experiences,
so one should go, for the most part, with their desires. |
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| 7.Q |
Describe
the event in one sentence (there’s time to expand later) |
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| 7.A |
In every
instance that i was ever spanked, which was never growing up,
which i think added to the taboo and fascination, i was never
able to completely let go, or to get it severe enough to cry,
until one and only one time, about a month ago. |
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| 8.Q |
Tell me
a bit about yourself around this time. |
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| 8.A |
My relationship
was never stronger, as it was just before some powerfully painful
experiences that my wife is now dealing with, but besides our
normal financial and drug affiliated problems, it was a time
of great closeness and happiness that i wish to someday and
somehow return to. |
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| 9.Q |
List the
sequence of events leading up to your thrill. Try to remember
how you felt at each stage. The smallest detail could be important
(this is your chance to expand). |
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| 9.A |
Generally
while on the receiving end of a spanking there is little fear
of truly being out of control. Because even though She’s
got a swing like a professional baseball player, and the pain
induced by our oversized wooden hairbrush is intense to say
the least, it never causes me anymore then to squeal out in
pain.
On this particular instance however, as per my request from
earlier conversations, She had no set number of whacks that
She intended to go for, broke up alternating sessions with
both that big brush and an extremely painful bamboo switch
we got at the Rag Shop; with corner time, and enunciated Her
displeasure with my actions that earned me the very severe
discipline session verbally and with much harder whacks to
really drive Her point home, and after my 3rd or 4th trip
over Her knee, it was too much to deal with both physically
and emotionally and my screams gave through to the most cathartic
cry of my entire life. |
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| 10.Q |
What were
your thoughts and feelings at the precise moment of thrill? |
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| 10.A |
The overwhelming
feeling was one of love, comfort, and protection, and for at
least a week afterwards i was like putty in Her hands. |
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| 11.Q |
What did
you do afterwards? |
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| 11.A |
I curled
up in Her arms and She held me as I cried out an entire life
time of guilt and shame for everything i’ve ever done
and got away with, and for how much in Her eternal debt i was
and am for being the person to finally break down that wall
for me. |
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| 12.Q |
What were
the risks? |
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| 12.A |
There were
no risks as we were already safely deep into our relationship,
and this is a conquest that She had been trying to achieve with
me for a long time. |
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| 13.Q |
What did
you imagine other people thought of you during and after the
event? |
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| 13.A |
Many people,
probably especially people who were physically punished as children;
of which i’m deeply against because i’ve seen the
long lasting effects it causes in people i’m very close
to, might not understand how it can cause such strong feelings
of protection on the part of the receiver, depending on the
mercy of the one punishing them, but again I know my wiring
is far from normal, and this is a fascination that has been
building in me for over a quarter of a century now, and my ideas
of compassion and romance are very severe and extreme, but it’s
who i am. |
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| 14.Q |
How often
do you think about the event, and why? |
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| 14.A |
It was
something i envisioned a lot before it happened, but since the
actual event, it’s something that i carry inside, that
can never be taken away from me. |
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| 15.Q |
Some people
probably don’t understand how such a thing can thrill
you; explain it to them. |
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| 15.A |
my answer
to question 13 is probably my best explanation of how something
which to one might be frightening and very unwanted for me after
a life time of lament over not getting it, became the epitome
of the extents of how compassion could be displayed. |
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| 16.Q |
What three
changes could have made the experience better, and why? |
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| 16.A |
There is
nothing that i would have changed, other then had it been done
to me at a very young age, when i would have been completely
in Her control, which is the safest feeling place i’ve
ever been in. |
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Is there
anything you want to add? |
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