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  <your background>
1.Q Tell me about the first time you remember being thrilled.
1.A My earliest memory of being thrilled would have to have been when I was five. My family had just moved to Washington State and I had the biggest room in our new house. It had windows that covered an entire wall with lace curtains. I had a canopy bed and I felt like the little girl in The Secret Garden like a princess. I was excited and thrilled everyday when I was in that room.
2.Q What’s the slightest thing to have thrilled you?
2.A I get the smallest thrill out of being spontaneous or doing something that I usually wouldn’t. For instance, I approached someone at a club and asked them to dance. I would usually never do that.
3.Q What’s the most frightening yet thrilling thing you’ve done?
3.A It would be sexually. While having sex, choking and breath-play gives me the biggest thrill although it terrifies me. Also, being held under water.
4.Q Tell me why you’re not completely sensible.
4.A I think too often with my emotions, my heart. I see something I like and I just kind of rush at it without thinking. I am the kind of person who doesn’t always think before I act, especially with my words.
5.Q What’s the most uninhibited thing you’ve ever done?
5.A The most inhibited thing I have ever done was going out on Halloween night, scantily clad in hardly anything. I went to club after club and danced suggestively with women while men around me watched. I have never felt more alive or more inhibited in my life.
6.Q What have you considered doing for pleasure but were too concerned about the risks?
6.A Having my partner do body piercings on me. The thought of my partner putting a needle through my skin, permanently (for the most part) marking me is a big turn on, but I know it would be terribly risky.


  <your thrill>
7.Q Describe the event in one sentence (there’s time to expand later)
7.A Tied up to a Rack with clothes pins attached to my body while I was flogged.
8.Q Tell me a bit about yourself around this time.
8.A It was three months ago. We had been in a relationship, living together, for six months and I felt safe with him. He pushed my edges both sexually and non-sexually. I was ready and willing to experiment and feel as much as I could. I am a masochist.
9.Q List the sequence of events leading up to your thrill. Try to remember how you felt at each stage. The smallest detail could be important (this is your chance to expand).

I removed my clothes, as he instructed. I leaned against the Rack and he began putting chains around my ankles, wrists and elbows. Then, he locked me on and I literally could not move, at all. He then inserted a ball-gag and put on a blind-fold. I was drooling everywhere because of the ball-gag and it was humiliating. He then took out clothespins and applied them around my breasts, on my nipples, my inner and outer labia and my hood/clitoris. I whined, cried and struggled with each application. The pain was felt strongly, but it was a good pain. I could feel a release, like orgasm, but less physical. He whispered to me that he was going to remove the pins (about ten minutes had elapsed by this time).

With each one that was removed the pain was ten times worse. He started at the breasts, which had grown numb, but as he removed them, the blood rushed back in and I cried out slightly. He played with the pins that were on my genitalia for a while and I knew those were going to hurt badly. He removed the labial ones first. I screamed out. He removed the ball gag, blindfold and restraints.

I had to stand, shaky-legged and whimpered and watched as he reached down to remove the one on my hood/clit. When it was removed, a sensation of burning and tenderness rushed through me. I fell forward into his arms, crying and screaming. The pain was more intense than any I had ever felt. He then bent me over the bed, without giving me a breather and flogged me until I fell into what can only be described as a sub-space feeling. He held me and I fell asleep.

10.Q What were your thoughts and feelings at the precise moment of thrill?
10.A Really, there were very few. Sometimes I had songs in my head or poems I would recite so it would be easier to take the pain. Other times, I would have a blank mind, focusing and riding the pain.
11.Q What did you do afterwards?
11.A I slept, deeply.
12.Q What were the risks?
12.A Passing out, bruising, very minimal risks.
13.Q What did you imagine other people thought of you during and after the event?
13.A Most people would be horrified and wouldn’t understand it at all. That is okay, I did it for me because it is who I am. I don’t explain my actions to people in order to justify, I explain only to educate. My partner, however, was incredibly proud of me and was amazed.
14.Q How often do you think about the event, and why?
14.A Oh, at least once a week. It was intense and it formed who I have become since then. It made me feel strong and free. I could release everything, good and bad, in just those few hours.
15.Q Some people probably don’t understand how such a thing can thrill you; explain it to them.

You know how you want something really badly, like a new car or something as simple as some cool shoes? Well, imagine that those simple desires were unacceptable. Imagine that if you told anyone you wanted those shoes, they would grimace, judge and make judgments about you that you knew were not true.

Now, imagine u found a store that carried these the shoes and you went in. Around you were people just like you who also wanted those shoes. You could look at them all you wanted, talk about them and wear them around the store. Then, remember that you have to go back out where people don’t understand, where they will ridicule you. That is how I feel. In my home, in my mind, I am safe to express myself through pain, bondage, and servitude. In the outside, there are few places I can do that. Imagine you had something like that you had to hide.

16.Q What three changes could have made the experience better, and why?
16.A Longer, with sexual intercourse and if I had recorded it. I would’ve liked to have more time to feel that way. I would have liked to experience orgasm afterwards and I would have liked something tangible, a video, so that I could view it.
  Is there anything you want to add?
  I hope I did not offend you or give too much sexual information. I assumed you meant ANY thrill. I look forward to updates on your project.
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what do you find thrilling?